“The most important factor of a happy life, in my personal opinion, is loving yourself completely and unapologetically.”
It took me a really long time to learn to love myself. For so many years, I picked myself apart daily. My skin, my stomach, my hair, my face. Everything. Growing up, I was the skinny, underweight girl. Because of this label, I slowly fell into this bad pattern of hating my body. Wishing I could gain weight. Eating anything and everything I could.
I was badly skinny shamed in middle/high school, constantly called names like “toothpick” and always told I was “flat as a board”. You can only assume the toll this takes on a teenager’s self confidence, especially when I had none to begin with.
The words of my peers ate me alive everyday, and every night. I dreamed of a curvy body, boobs, and a big booty, knowing fully well I’d never have those things because of the way I’m built.
I ate very unhealthy and never cared about my body because I always assumed it would just stay skinny forever.
But then pregnancy hit, and I had quickly found a new love for this body of mine. I viewed it as a temple and a scared vessel, I saw myself in a completely different light as I carried my son through those 9 months.
Eventually I found yoga, and through yoga I learned about self love. I then started to realize how important self care really is. As someone who suffers from mental illness, I needed this so much more than I even knew. I had realized that for so long, I neglected myself, my own needs, my health, and my mental capacity especially. In order to be a patient mom, understanding partner, and genuine person in general, I needed to spend more time on myself. I needed to fall in love with myself.
Just like yoga, your self love journey shouldn’t have a destination. It’s a constant learning process, and even once you’ve accomplished enlightenment (or in this case, loving yourself completely), you should still be a student. Meaning you should still do those things daily in order to continue your journey throughout your whole life.
A few things I like to do for self care include:
- Relax into a hot bath, filled with essential oils, dried flower petals, and a carrier oil of choice (I personally prefer coconut oil or sweet almond oil)
- Make a detoxifying face mask (such as this Indian Healing Clay mask that I SWEAR by; just mix the clay with ACV or purified water and feel the toxins literally being pulled out of your skin! I suggest spritzing the mask with rosewater as it hardens to moisten it as well as hydrate your skin, and don’t leave this mask on for more than 20 minutes otherwise it’s almost impossible to scrub off. A little redness will be expected after washing this mask off.)
- Take a walk or hike by yourself. This one is a form of meditation for me, when I’m one with nature and no one else is around, I feel so much lighter and in tune with this Earth we inhabit. Nature is such a healing therapy, I highly recommend getting outside every single day. Vitamin D is so important for not only our bodies, but our mental health.
- Make a big smoothie with all your favorite fruits/vegetables. We make smoothies nearly every day in our house, it’s become one of Landon and my traditions every afternoon. Let your child(ren) help you make the smoothie, you’ll be surprised with how good it may turn out! Kids are so intuitive, and this is a great way to teach them healthy habits. This is the blender I personally use as it’s affordable and works really well.
- Take a nap. This one is obvious, but if you’re a parent, student, or just feeling overwhelmed and exhausted, TAKE A NAP. It’s okay to rest, it’s okay to take a break from being an adult.
- Do some yoga/exercise. Also an obvious one, but I for one can attest to how calming doing yoga is when you’re feeling burnt out or stressed. Do a quick class on YouTube, or free flow and allow your body to guide you. Guaranteed you’ll feel as light as a feather afterwards.
- Do your hair and makeup and dress like you’re going on a date (even if you’re not leaving the house). Now this one may sound shallow, but it’s absolutely not. Feeling beautiful is a form of self love, and there’s so many ways of doing it. When I’m feeling self conscious, I like to curl my hair, throw on a cute outfit, and take pictures of myself because DAMN I deserve to look and feel beautiful.
- Buy yourself flowers or plants. This is always something that makes me excited. Picking out a unique plant or some of your favorite flowers, taking care of them, and loving them is 100% self care. When your environment is thriving and vibrant, so are you.
- Meditate. This one might be hard if you’ve never done it or have a hard time sitting still. I suggest starting out slow, a few minutes a day and then you can work your way up to 30-60 minutes. Below is one of my favorite Chakra meditations:
There is many, many forms of self care but those above are what I try to practice daily. You’ll notice a shift in your confidence, self love, and appreciation for yourself once you start incorporating a self care routine into your life. Take time EVERY SINGLE DAY for yourself. Show your child(ren) how important it is, and they’ll follow in your footsteps with showing themselves love each day.
